Trapped in the Cycle: The Hidden Struggles of Binging and How to Break It
- Paulina Hupka
- Mar 10
- 6 min read
The challenge with any form of disordered eating is that we still have to eat.
If we don’t eat, we die.
The obsession with food, eating too little, binging, snacking, or starving ourselves for weight loss all involve food confrontation.
On top of that, we have family, friends, movies, shows, and social media that talk about the ‘perfect bodies' - the thin and successful women and men. It seems like thinness and success go hand-in-hand.
So, I’m not surprised that many people struggle with eating disorders or disordered eating patterns, obsessive thoughts or rigid exercising to meet those “standards.”
Pursuing this “ideal” shows us that:
‘If I don’t meet this idea, I’m not popular/beautiful/lovable/accepted for who I am.'.
What it really stirs up in us is that by trying to be like that, we naturally face difficulties because these ideals are impossible to meet.
But instead of acknowledging that these ‘standards’ are unnatural, we assume that we are the problem.
In reality, eating 1200 calories or running until your feet bleed to burn off calories is NOT healthy. 1200 calories is the daily requirement for a 3-year-old. If you are not 3 years old, you need to eat more!!
But being overweight is not healthy either. Working out and running is considered healthy. Is it not? – You might wonder.
The line is thin and the claim of something being healthy very quickly turns into unhealthy.
The Real Dilemma of Being Trapped in This Binge Cycle Is: Wish vs Reality
WISH: Trying to meet a certain standard
equals starving, excessive exercising, rigid meal planning and food weighting, and strict rules
equals being perceived as beautiful, competent, productive, popular, lovable
Vs
REALITY: Trying to meet a standard and doing "all those things"
means when you exercise more, you need to eat more
means starving makes you weaker, hungry and hangry
means that those strict rules turn away the people who are already loving you for you: beautiful, competent, popular, lovable.
Success isn’t measured by your weight or your looks.
Productivity isn’t measured by how much work, exercise and other activities you can squeeze into one day.
Unfortunately, our society has developed this perspective: you are only productive when you burn out, if it comes easy to you, you must be not productive.
How it shows up in real life is that we stress ourselves out; we are overwhelmed with our impossible to-do list and burnout.
What do you truly get from that? Are you now successful or are just too exhausted to live?
Honestly, this development is really sad.
When you are too exhausted to do anything anymore, your natural physiological response kicks in:
Your body demands its energy reserves to be refilled!
You need to rest and not do anything for a while.
Even cooking and taking care of your health can be exhausting.
I totally get it! Choosing to eat takeout or just eat those delicious cookies and leftover cake is easy, low effort, and it feels good. You experience a dopamine hit.
But when we don’t address those impossible goals, those hidden beliefs that we must be and look a certain way to be successful, guilt and shame kick in again:
"Why did I eat all of those cookies?"
"I’m not even good enough to resist cookies."
"I ate so healthy today. Now, this was for nothing."
"I’m a total failure."
"I might as well just eat the rest of those cookies"
So, tomorrow, you just have to start again: same strategy, same rules, same meal plan with fewer calories to offset the eaten calories from the day before and maybe an additional exercise session?
What you are really doing is just keeping the cycle of binging, burnout and shame alive.
Does that sound like you?
I feel you. And you are not alone. I get that all you want is just to look and feel beautiful.
This is how my life used to look like, too.
But here are the good news. There is a way out of this cycle:
It’s not easy, and it takes time and effort.
3 Things you can do for “free” to start your transformation:
No more food restrictions or eating rules. Eat what you love and give yourself time to enjoy every bite. Make sure every meal has 30g of protein (meat, fish, eggs, lentils, peas, tofu, etc.)
Start a gratitude journal: Every evening write down 3 things that you are proud of in general or that were good today. The only rule: nothing can be repeated.
Exercise less (if you are exercising a lot): Aim for 3-4 exercise sessions (each about 40 minutes) a week.
How do I know if I’m exercising a lot?
You exercise more than 2 hours per day
You exercise 6-7 days a week
You have thoughts like, “I can add another exercise session here”
Thoughts like “If I run for 60 minutes I burn off 590 calories so I can eat this cake now”
You might be wondering if that 3-4 exercise sessions per week might not be enough.
Remember this is not a recommendation for the rest of your life. This suggestion intends to challenge you to break the binge cycle. Once your body has returned to its natural balance, you are free to re-adjust your exercise plan.
These 3 steps can be the start of your journey from binging and stress to more balance and peace with food.
But don't just stop there!
Without mental and emotional wellness, your mind and body may remain the same.
Take it from someone who went the hard route.
Simply stopping binging was actually the easiest part.
It took only a few months, but the mindset shift, developing a growth mindset, questioning my beliefs and unearthing what my emotions really mean are the hard part.
I have been working on this for several years now.
Here’s the secret:
Shifting mindsets, changing limiting beliefs and understanding emotional triggers are the key components to truly transforming from binging to balance AND this part never ends.
As long as you are alive, there will always be something that throws you off balance, something that you cannot even think about yet.
The best time to start your transformation is today:
Beat the Binge and Build Balance!!
If you are looking for more in-depth support, I’m here to help.
I have a 4-month hybrid program coming up that is designed to do exactly that!
Nurture your Body: Changes in your Eating Habits
Organize your Mind: Shift your mindset, learn to find balance, flexibility and how that shows up in your life
Unwind to reset yourself: Relaxation, Sleep and Resilience are the foundation for long-term success out of the binge cycle
Reframe for body-mind growth: Learn, practice and internalize strategies for mental balance and emotional regulation. Here, we go deep and start the seeds of your long-lasting transformation.
Influences need to be challenged: Some of your behaviour are mirrors of what society (friends, family, doctors, movies, social media and so on) has told you what you need to do to be popular and successful. These actions are not working. When you learn where these come from and what their true intention is, you can truly break free from the bonds of the binge cycle.
Sustainability in Your New Habits will facilitate success. Through all the previous modules you have unlearned and challenged your beliefs, mindset, interpretations of your emotions and actions. Now, it’s time to build a system of long-lasting, sustainable, helpful habits that support you in your transformation.
Holistic Transformation: When Body, Mind, Emotions and Spirituality are aligned, any change becomes possible and long-lasting. A whole new you, no more binges, no more struggles, but tools and strategies that you internalize for changes in all areas of your life.
Does that sound intriguing? Reach out and let us talk about what our collaboration in hybrid form can look like.
Remember, if you just want to start now, try out those 3 steps.
I really hope, that taking the first step will be the catalyst for your transformation from binging to balance. I know how much it sucks when you feel like you are controlled by those urges and negative emotions.
